Feb
17
Draft #2 of essay #1
February 17, 2008 | | Leave a Comment
Your second draft of your personal narrative essay will be the same idea, topic, story, event, etc., but it will use all new language! In other words, I don’t want to recognize the second draft immediately upon seeing it; I don’t want to be reading the same draft that I did the first time around. Again, you’re telling the same story — just find a way to tell it differently!
Second draft components:
• Start in the middle of a scene with action or description.
• Use all new language (One suggestion: start with a blank screen and paste one resonant sentence from draft one or from one of your writing prompts to the top of the screen; start there).
• Have a strong sense of place/setting
• Work in your character sketch from #2 above.
• Try the present tense for at least one scene.
• Don’t forget the insight and reflection into the significance of your story
You’ll be putting the final version of this essay together for the mid-term portfolio. This will require a careful process of sorting and selecting from drafts one and two. Your final version will be carefully crafted and edited to reflect your best work.
Writing prompts for personal narrative essay draft #2
These prompts are to guide you in generating new material for you second draft. Choose three and aim for a full page for each (your choice — to be handed in with your mid-term portfolio).
1) Setting
First write a new scene that is pure description of a place that’s important to your story. Where is your story taking place (a football field, a tattoo parlor, an ocean, a hospital room)? Take yourself out of this and pretend you’re behind a video camera and you’re filming this place. What do you see? What do you hear? What do you smell? What are the textures and colors? Work on evoking a very specific “scene” for your reader.
Skip a few lines and write another paragraph. Where is this place? What happens in this place? What’s your relationship with this place? Why is this place important?
2) Character sketch
First write a description of a person who is central to your place (a coach, a friend, a parent, a pet?). Take yourself out of this too. How would you describe this person to someone who doesn’t know them? What are their distinctive traits or characteristics? How would you recognize them in a crowd or at a distance? What objects do you associate with them?
Next, skip a few lines and write another paragraph. What’s your relationship with this person? What specific moments stand out for you when you think about this person? Why are they important to your personal narrative?
3) Indelible moments
Make a long list of important moments, images, and instances that come to mind when you think about your story. You’ve worked on this before, but add to it! Now choose three that you haven’t yet written about. Highlight them and for each one write a new “scene” in the present tense.
4) Use a couple of the prompts below to write a new paragraph:
• I know how to…
• I believe…
• I am a…
• Most people think_________________about (you or your topic), but what they don’t know is_______________________.
• I expected ____________________, but ____________________ happened.
5) Investigation and inquiry:
• Make a list of specific things that your readers wanted to know more about.
• Make a list of specific things that you want to explore further.
• Come up with three specific examples that weren’t in your first draft.
• Find three specific pieces of information that you couldn’t initially remember in retelling your story and ask a friend or family member for help in reconstructing that scene in your essay. Write them an e-mail or call them up on the phone!
6) Show; Don’t Tell:
Find moments in your first draft where you’ve written phrases like — “I love it” or “It’s the best” or “It’s indescribable.” Show your readers what you mean. Use simile, metaphor and strong images to describe the “indescribable.” Explain why you “love it” and show through clear example. Compare the “best” day of school or “best” event in your life to other “great” objects, moments, etc.
(assignment adapted from Professor Megan Fulwiler, College of St. Rose)
